Journey or sister B K Shivani to arrive at this state of breathtaking clarity and simplicity:
In the words of B K Shivani:
Like each one of you around, I think 22 years back I was sitting that side, and before that my mother started coming for meditation sessions to the brahman kumaris.
She would start asking me to go to the centre and the more she asked me to go the more I moved away because no one can force me into doing anything that typical so I said I’m not interested, I don’t need it, life is perfect for me academically, personally and socially.
Everything was perfect so why do I need to do meditation. Because meditation is not the way it is today i.e. more accepted. It was more one of the things few people do who had problems in their life is what I believed and I didn’t have a problem in my life so I didn’t find the need to go to the centre.
But every week on thursday and sunday, she would make an effort and every morning on sunday I already had my excuse ready why I didn’t want to go today, either it would be homework, either it would be my headache, my stomach everything.
I did everything possible not to come here. I tried very hard to move away from not coming here and then i didn’t know why i just saw a lot of change in her, actually a lot of transformation from being a typical mother who gets worried for children, anxiety if they are late in that era of without phones and very anxious if the child is going through something and I suddenly within a year or so I found her very strong, very powerful even stronger than everybody else in the house.
I knew she was getting something which was right and then I said okay now I want to do this course. When she stopped asking me to do it then I said I want to now do this meditation course.
Then when I came to the center and like all of you were told in this one week that god is teaching us here and the sister who gave me the course she said god is directly giving this knowledge and I just stared at her. I walked away, I said I’m not coming back to this place.
They say very strange things over here and in fact I went back and I told my father not to send my mother here because it’s not a right place. I said: how can you talk like this, god is for everybody you can’t say he teaches here, it’s not done like this.
After six months I again went back and I said: you prove it to me then I will understand. She said it can’t be proved. I said: then I cannot understand she said you first accept it and start experimenting with it.
I said how can I experiment if I don’t believe that it’s there. So we were in this dilemma whether to first experiment or whether to first have it proved what to do and then I remembered that as a science student in maths we were taught that to begin with the belief suppose
A=B You write that first line suppose a is equal to b and then you go on proving it and in the end. You will again come back to yes a is equal to b.
So I had to put the first line as suppose god is giving this knowledge now what do I have to do. So she said okay meditation every day and moodly class every morning, high vegetarian lifestyle.
I said I’ll do only for three months can’t live this kind of a lifestyle forever. She said only three months and then I really did that three months sincerely. Did it every single day, three months because god cannot be seen, cannot be proved, soul cannot be seen, cannot be proved because anything that is not visible cannot be seen, cannot be proved but it can be experienced.
So then began a journey of studying and meditating and it did not take three months actually it was much sooner than that that I could experience a very personal relationship of love and power from god and also a self change self transformation so within I think two months or so I said A=B.
This is the place and I started the journey and then it was a daily daily moodly class, daily meditation then about 10 years or 8 years later I was going to the studio for helping in creating programs for the brahma kumaris and one day I was asked to sit on the chair to do the program and I was very resistant because i don’t find myself eligible for that and I said I don’t know anything. What has to be done in this program, I don’t know what to share, I don’t know what to speak.
They say no you just sit and surrender. So it was a very beautiful experience that just like these two chairs and I sat here the sister who was invited to do the interview she came up to me and she said what am I supposed to ask I said don’t scare me anymore, I have no idea, I have been told just sit and it will happen.
So you also just sit and it will happen, but that is your personal relationship with God, and I just said, “Baba, I know nothing.” Whatever happens, nobody knows me now, so it’s not going to insult me in front of the world.” It’s about you, so you take care of what has to happen, and it was an amazing experience. 30 minutes just went by as she asked and I answered, and while I was answering, I was learning. I was answering, but I didn’t know those answers, so while it was happening, I was learning. That day, we recorded eight episodes and didn’t know where the content came from. When it aired on TV, it got a good response, and I couldn’t explain to the people around me what had happened.
Tell yourself, “I am a peaceful soul.” “I am a powerful soul.” What advice or insight can you offer to those who say those words? You know, “I am a peaceful soul.” “I am a powerful soul.” But it becomes like a mantra, like an affirmation, and it doesn’t quite stick. How do you make it stick? Even if it becomes an affirmation, an affirmation will become a reality. And when we come on the first day to learn Raj yoga, we come with all our flaws and our impurities, and the first-day baba says, “I am a peaceful soul, and there is no peace here.” “You say I am a peaceful soul when we go out in the world.”
Today, people are saying, “I am stressed.” It’s a very common line. I am stressed, and some people today are saying I’m depressed, because when we keep saying this affirmation, “I am stressed, I’m stressed, I’m stressed, you are stressed, we are stressed, everyone is stressed,” the stress levels in the world have gone much higher because we kept re-repeating this affirmation. Then some of us started saying, “I’m depressed.” Someone opens the window and says the weather is so depressing today. The most important factor is personal responsibility because you can consider any situation in your life. I’ll share the experience of a sister who recently returned from the United States and shared her experience with me: She said three years ago she just switched on the television and this program happened to be on the air, but the episode was about what to do if a family member dies and how to handle that situation, and she heard this episode about the soul moving on the journey and if the family they leave behind cries and moans, then all that pain radiates to the soul. Her 21-year-old son died in an accident on the fifth day, and she said her first thought when she found out was, “Neither will I cry nor will I allow anyone in my family to cry because I do not want to radiate any pain to my child.” So she immediately connected with the center in her city, Florida, and she invited the sisters. She said, “Please do one week of meditation in my house.” I don’t want anyone to cry.” Thank you. I mean, I think the image that comes to mind when you speak about god is that you sit, maybe not in an empty vessel, with a purely positive and peaceful soul whose intellect is quiet so that god can use it, and then you speak words that are influenced by the fact that many people have the experience that god is everywhere.
Is God within them responsible for all of the world’s crimes, all of the wrongs committed by some souls?
What is a god inside them sitting and doing when they are doing all of this?
So when we said God is inside everyone, it was a way of teaching people to live a good life and say don’t hurt anybody, don’t do wrong to anybody, respect everyone, and treat everyone like a god. But as we begin to understand it, we realize that this was more like If God were in everyone, we would be perfect; we would not have a single imperfect thought, but that is not the case; we have very few perfect feelings and thoughts, so God’s remembrance is inside everyone; a connection with God is inside every soul; and every soul has the same qualities as God, so that connection, the remembrance, the qualities, and the powers of God are in everybody; but there is a distinction between the remembrance and qualities of God in everybody.
Could you tell us a little bit about your relationship with God?
We don’t even need to take time out once we’re in a relationship because you’re always talking, conversing, and experiencing him, but to begin that relationship, we need to spend time connecting with him, so the way I would do it is begin your morning with the first good morning there, the first thought good morning; nowadays, people send a lot of good mornings on social media, so the first thing in the morning before saying good morning is to look at your phone.
So the first thought is a connection, then the study, then the meditation, and now in the day-to-day activities. Just before leaving for the day, sit for a minute in silence, connect, and tell him everything you have planned for the day. Invite him to be with you throughout the day. During the day, keep sharing, “This is what happened, and this is what we’re going to do next.” Very soon, God will be with you always. You will start feeling it because it’s a very natural companionship, a relationship where you’re sharing everything. Raj Yoga Meditation: A Very Personal Relationship Not a one-way conversation, but a two-way conversation in which he speaks, touches us, and we respond; so that’s a relationship that can’t be talked about much, but it has to be experienced a lot, so give yourself a few months for that.
